Cleaning

So Wed is my usual day off, and with the smell of spring in the air...it is now time for Spring Cleaning!! Believe it or not...this is the one time during the year I ENJOY cleaning! The windows open, the Fresh air coming in, the Heat turned off. This time of the year is the BEST.

Here I was, laundry first. Is this exciting..no, but I am more productive with it since the change in the season. I'm spent a good 5-10min separating the clothes (if this is something that you don't understand...I will write a blog on how to do laundry and why) As I am separating I realize one down side to this season...bugs. Now I am not a "girly girl" I mess with snakes, worms, dirt, grease, etc but I do put a halt when it comes to bugs. Ewwww the fact that most have more than four legs, and the legs that they have, have little grippers on them should warrant enough of a reason to hate them, but since you asked I will go on. They are small enough that half the time you don't realize they are there until it is too late. When you step on them you get hear that bone chilling crunch that just sends a shudder down my spine. I am one of those people that even if I THINK a bug is crawling on me I will jump up and down and strip all my clothing off...i may look like a fool..but I will be bug free! So why are their bugs in my laundry?? I have no clue, it's not like it was there long, but lets face it bugs like cold damp places and this is one of them. Do you even need to ponder on how I did my laundry?? Short of putting gloves on, my only option was to get it in the washing machine as fast as possible turn it on...PRAY that the water will drown them, and if not surely the dryer would heat them to oblivion. As soon as it's in the wash I do a whole body shake and fan my clothing just in case one decided to get on me or lay it's eggs on me or something like that!! When they come out of the dryer..they will be dead..and I can handle a dead bug! I'll just shake all the clothes outside before folding! No totally kidding, we own tissues and garbage bags all you need to dispose of dead bugs!

Next I did the dishes. Loading the dishwasher, spring got its next negative. Milk doesn't last like it used to in the girls sippy cups! There was only that little bit left in the bottom from the morning before and as I turned the top I saw it was curdled..now why is it that our mind seems to think that just because we SAW it was bad that wasn't enough as a act of reflex my nose had to take a wiff just as the top came off...yep, definitely spoiled! That wasn't it, spring strike three, I'm sweating by the end of HAND washing because the heat of the water plus the heat of outside just downright over heated me!!

Now I decide to take a break just so I can re-appreciate spring before tackling my next job. That...was short lived. The minute I sat down apparently my nose and my eyes decided,at that moment, it is spring indeed, sneeze, sneeze, itch, itch....ssssnnnniiiifff! ARE YOU KIDDING ME???? At that point I was really re-thinking how much I love spring time. I popped a Claritin and continued on my journey for a clean house. The dreaded bathroom!

Of course this is everyone's favorite place in the house to clean! Am I right. Something about the thought of how many butts have graced my toilet seat since the last time I washed it really puts a smile on my face. Now you add the dust bunnies that seem to accumulate the last week that the heat is on, Oh and lets not forget the whisker clippings from my husbands electric shaver...because that's definitely attractive! I pull out my "scrubbing bubbles" and become lost in thought that they shouldn't call it scrubbing bubbles if the bubbles don't scrub and I have to add my OWN effort. I seriously contemplated calling the company out on their false advertising...but decided better of it. After about a half hour I stepped back and took a look at my work! All and all...not bad for my time spent. I got down on my knees to pick something up and OH MY!! A little tip for when you're cleaning, unless you want more work to do, NEVER get on your child's level. It's lucky children don't think about cleanliness when they are walking around the house, because let me tell you looking from that level NOTHING seems clean!!! I would HATE to be a midget (or little person-whatever is politically correct for them; personally I've been called a bitch and that's not politica...oh wait never mind) ANYWAY...think about it they are essentially my daughters height but have the mentality of a adult. I'm sorry but none of us walk around on our knees at stores and such and see the UNDERSIDE of everything and know if it needs to be cleaned. They do..it almost makes me want to try just so I can tell the place how filthy they are! Then my train of thought goes a bit further and I wonder.."if you go to an all midget home does the top of everything ever get clean? Kind of like the top of a fan...if you cant see it- it's not dirty"

Needless to say I went back through and cleaned everything ON MY KNEES. I felt good afterward. Very happy with what I accomplished, I sat down on the couch to relax...and what did I see. For all the work that I had put forth, one couch fully covered in folded clothes, clean dishes on top of the counter that need to be put away, dishes in the dishwasher that need to be put away..dirty dishes from breakfast and lunch in the sink....(breath)....laundry that needed to swapped out, leftover lunch food on the table from the kids...toys from one end of the house to the next. SERIOUSLY? for all the work I did, it sure as heck didn't look like I got ANYTHING done.

The moral of this story A mother's work is NEVER done and being a Midget must really suck!